The Messy Middle of Healing and how to move through it

Hello

I wanted to share something that’s come up in clinic recently the stage of healing where things are going well… and then we suddenly feel like we’re slipping back.

You’ve probably heard me talk about the stages of healing before, how we begin by calming the immune system, clearing inflammation, and supporting the body with food, herbs and acupuncture. During this time, we often see the biofilms start to clear, the lungs feel lighter, and the nervous system begins to regulate.

As symptoms settle bloating, reflux, fatigue, pain, something unexpected often happens too, boundaries begin to firm up. People start saying no. They feel clearer in themselves. It’s as if the fog lifts and there’s more space to choose what feels right.

Then comes the deeper layer

The second stage of healing is where we really begin to reset the gut microbiome and digestive system. We work on clearing out what doesn’t belong and nourishing what does. And with that comes something powerful, a stronger gut instinct.

At this point, we often find ourselves ready to look at habits. The ones that kept us stuck. The patterns that made us more vulnerable to viruses, bugs and burnout in the first place.

But the third stage, the real transformation — is the hardest

This is where neuroplasticity kicks in. Where we’re no longer just treating symptoms, but reshaping identity.

And it’s also where most people resist.

You know what to do, when to do it, and how to do it. I’ve helped you build a plan. And yet… you stop. You procrastinate. You feel amazing and then suddenly self-sabotage.

Why?

Because change is hard. And more than that, it’s unfamiliar. Your nervous system is wired for safety and conserving energy. Even when the new way is better, the old way feels safer, simply because it’s known.

This is when I often know as the Messy Middle.

If you’ve worked with me through this process, you’ll know that we don’t separate the body from the mind. We support the nervous system in clinic with acupuncture, herbs, nutrition, but that regulation needs to continue outside of sessions.

Meditation is one of the best tools to help with this, but it’s often the one that feels most out of reach.

“I tried that. I can’t do it.”

“I’m not good at meditating.”

“I don’t know where to start.”

Sound familiar?

I’ve felt that too. Here’s the truth, it’s not about doing it perfectly. It’s about finding the right guidance and voice to lead you back to yourself.

This is where I often refer clients to Paul Cashmore

I’ve been collaborating with Paul this year because his work fits seamlessly with this stage of the healing process. When I’ve helped you get the plan in place the what, the when and the how, but you still find yourself stuck… Paul’s approach helps unlock that next layer.

Paul is a trained NLP practitioner, performance coach, and breath work facilitator. You might recognise him from Channel 4’s Hunted where he worked as part of the psychological profiling team, understanding behaviour, motivation, and decision-making under pressure.

It’s not just his CV that matters here, it’s how he works.

Paul has lived experience with chronic issues and burnout. He gets the internal battles. The fear. The resistance. The survival patterns that helped us cope… but no longer serve us.

His new meditation programme is designed specifically for people who struggle with overthinking those who find it hard to drop in and stay consistent. His voice is steady, grounded, and real. The daily practices are simple, accessible, and supported by healing sound frequencies to help shift your state gently over time.

Whether you’re completely new to meditation or looking for something to support your nervous system in between treatments, this is a beautiful resource to add to your toolkit.

As part of our collaboration, Paul is offering the Learn to Heal community 25% off a full year’s membership. Just use the code LEARNTOHEAL at Checkout

How do we stay consistent?

The truth is, we can all do the 30-day detox. We can go sober for a month, lose the weight, start strong. But the real work? It’s what happens afterwards.

With the right mix of nervous system support, seasonal food and herbal strategies, and mindset training you build change that sticks.

Does that mean you’ll never fall off the wagon? Absolutely not. You’re human. I’m human. We all do it. The difference is that now, when that moment comes (and it will), you have the tools to catch yourself and get back on track, without shame or judgement.

If you’re in the messy middle, you’re not failing, you’re transforming

This is where the real work begins. And you don’t have to do it alone.

That’s why I created my health coaching programme, to give you structure, tools and support during the trickiest parts of change. It’s a blend of strategy and softness knowing what to do, and how to do it, with a rhythm that works with your body, not against it.

Here’s to the deep work,

The kind of healing that lasts.

And doing it together, with support.

💜

If you’re curious about coaching, reply to this email or book a free discovery call here. And if you’re ready to add a daily meditation ritual to your week, don’t forget to explore Paul’s programme and use your discount code. Here